Hands off the Thighs.



I cannot help myself from staring at this African. The smile just gives me goosebumps; his humbleness is the icing on the cake. Forgive me my central land people but if a lady gets snatched by the lake people just let her go. In the modern society, to find a real man is a pearl amidst this walking sharks that just want to eat me. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes I need love but all the time I need money. But then again man proposes, God disposes

Maybe this eagerness to find myself a man in this ungrateful depressed and broke life of mine has been steered by the way I see my older brother treating his wife. I mean in another life, if we were not related I would still be in your life as a wife. Again don’t get me long, I’m not lusting after my brother but real recognizes real. I have a fair share of my uncles mistreating their wives and I wish no one in that in their lives. My mom keeps on saying they are family, but in my case we are just related but they are not my family.

I have the softest heart a human can have. I think God created fur from my heart. Probably why even as I am in my late 30s I wouldn’t mind having superpowers just to solve the gazillion problems the world is facing.

I can’t believe today will be another night with me and my bulb, but at least the bulb is high. If there was a chance one could choose a life every morning, today I would have taken the shift of Uriah’s wife. I crave cuddles tight hugs and kisses, but Njeri keeps on saying don’t settle for less. Today I can live by her rule. If you are not bringing to the table what my brother is offering to his wife or something better, don’t even bother to open your mouth. Just stare at my small ass wiggle away from you.

 

SOMETIMES I WANT LOVE, BUT ALL THE TIME I WANT MONEY.

 

I am not a proverbs 31 kind of lady; I would be booking a seat in hell if I do say so. As you come be patient with me for I am willing to be patient with you. This is not a job that you are applying so don’t tell me you are a perfectionist coz that is a turn off. We all make mistakes. Bad decisions are like Thanos, inevitable, for I have made so many. And others are yet to come. I am no lovey-dovey kind of girl, don’t expect small poems from me.

 

SCENT SHOULD BE A WHISPER, NOT A SHOUT.

 

I love my men light skinned, though I am a walking midnight so I have been told. My fellow “feminists” may claim such men are girls, I just need good genes for my children. I love my alone time and no I don’t hate you or don’t think I’m breaking up with you when I say I want to be alone; I just love myself. That’s my therapy time so don’t confuse my free time with my availability.

I hate flowers, don’t ever bring them to me. I don’t get the fancy in them and all they do is wither up. I daughter of Mekatilili wa Menza, due to my beauty, and Koitalel Arap Samoei, my height, love s to be nurtured for I have suffered.

Mimi ni a gal toto. Kiss me without my permission, hug me, kiss my boobs (I really love that), destroy my ovaries when I let you in my garden. Cuddle me up with your scent for I love a good man with a good scent; but remember cologne should be discovered, not announced. Don’t bathe with it. Let me study you, learn your ways put me in the middle of your circle so I can get to know you better.

Well, all this is possible if only I attended the parties my colleagues invite me to. Last time I attended a party, this dude kept checking me out from the moment I got in the club. Well… that rubbed my ego knowing mimi ni mali safi. I adjusted sitting position like a bait waiting for a predator only for him to turn out to be a boring guy. Like I said I love my alone time. I guess this came along with being raised by strict parents. I have major social anxiety, I’m too introverted and shy. I rarely take risks so I choose to play safe. I don’t trust easily so I lack friends to hang out with. If you can’t handle all that in me, then hands of the thighs. For today, allow me to catch up with Grey’s Anatomy, where else will I get to see my crush Jesse Williams?



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