Love, Sex and Comedy

There this predilection of always wanting to talk about your past when you meet with old friends. I don’t blame you at all. I mean most of us haven’t met each other in years. What are we to converse about except for memories? Be it a school friend or former workmate. Questions of the past must arise and everyone is curious where the rest you’ve not been in touch with are. I didn’t such a memorable college life. There were no major events but somehow I was popular at school. For what, I don’t know. We went to clubs on weekends. Maybe fights that erupted on those joints maybe the only thing that I would consider memorable. Some of those were oblitered from my mind long ago. I mean most you had their first cribs, first self-hosted party, first road trips in those years. Well, for us books were fun. “I’ll have a cold Tusker lite please” the table is full of spirits, beer and soft drinks. We are having a meet up after years after college. Some of these guys I have not seen in years. The ...

1. Push yourself to get up before the rest of the world - start with 7am, then 6am, then 5:30am. go to the nearest hill with a big coat and a scarf and watch the sun rise. Waking up is not a problem, but the sunrise lets think again about that. 2. Push yourself to fall asleep earlier - start with 11pm, then 10pm, then 9pm. wake up in the morning feeling re-energized and comfortable. This has no problem whatsoever easily done. 3. Get into the habit of cooking yourself a beautiful breakfast. fry tomatoes and mushrooms in real butter and garlic, fry an egg, slice up a fresh avocado and squirt way too much lemon on it. Sit and eat it and do nothing else. Breakfast can be done but for few days then back to brunch. 4. Stretch. start by reaching for the sky as hard as you can, then trying to touch your toes. roll your head. stretch your fingers. stretch everything. This is done everyday. 5. Buy a 1L water bottle. start with pushing yourself to drink the whole thing in a day...

I read that, taking care of a child is like taking care of a drunkard person for the first fourteen years and watch them fight a hangover for the next four years. Come to think about it, that quote somehow makes sense. Well, if that is so, my hangover ran out years I go and I’m experiencing real life. My name is Mark and this is my story. College was all fun. I mean who couldn’t wait to get out of their parent’s house. Freedom is one underrated right. No one to tell me to do this and that. I can actually stay seated on the chair and glued all day without someone call me to do house chores. Since I was far from home, that was one privilege I wouldn’t misuse at any moment. In this story of mine there are people you need to know. Meet the gang. To begin with is John. John is famous most of you know him. Second, meet Jane. Also Jane is popular. Remember the lady who almost committed suicide, that’s her. Mercy, also a member of the gang. Remember this lady, she plays a crucial role ...

There is something about surprises that I like, both giving and getting them. Mostly when one least expects them. Last week was my friend’s birthday. You see, with ladies, birthdays come in phases. First it starts with birthday month. One may be celebrating it on the last day of the month but once its day one of that month, we are already receiving birthday month captions on their posts. Then proceeds to birthday week. This is where things start escalating. “Birthday week” “I’m accepting gifts in all forms” “Cash and dates too”. On eve’s day, “birthday loading”. Finally, it concludes on the D-day. “It’s my birthday bitches” “keep calm cause it’s my birthday” (we have never and will never freak out cause it’s your birthday). On this day that’s when she posts screen shots of all the people who have wished her happy birthday. And this thing is getting old now. This is where all of us storm her inbox to wish her happy birthday. Men, please note, this wishes most of the times never get...

I was in my two weeks recovery of a heartbreak from my two and a half years realtionship. Lets say I was willing to hold on to her for as long as I could, but it seems not all things glitter that are gold. Remember Jane, the lady I helped overcome suicide when she was almost giving up? She called me on that Thursday afternoon. She wanted us to meet that evening. She said "Can I take you out for dinner tonight". At this time, all I wanted was some alone time, alot of alone time, but since it was Jane and she was very persistent, I fell for it. I left work fifteen minutes early to try and escape the evening traffic to town. Im sitted at the backbench of this mat scrolling my gallery. Damn! dont I have alot of pics on this gadget. Screenshots to be precise. What's all these that has been catching my attention that I have to have a record of it. The moment I realised my neck is becoming stiff I'm already in town. I thought I was escaping the traffic. Did everybody rea...

I don't think men are given enough credit for not cheating, I mean, it is very hard not to cheat in Nairobi. Take it from me, or this is my story, a while back, on a friday evening, me and my fiance are getting ready for bed. Out of the blue Ken calls. He wanted us to celebrate his promotion. One look at the wife and I know, she is not leaving this bed. So I politely decline the offer. Now this is what happens when you decline a close friends offer, he will start to remind you of the crap you've been through and the many times you borrowed Ksh.20 to go to mama kibandasky and how you have not been around. Basically, it's just easier to say yes. He confirms that the whole crew is going to be there, so yes, its going to be lit! In campus, there are the friends you make, they become brothers and you form a small community among yourselves. After graduation you move on, finding your better halves and allowing them into your community. After a few years, you all get kids and ...